The Conversation Playbook You’ll Wish You Had Sooner

Dear Andre, (2 min read)

Ever walked into a new space and thought: everyone already knows someone… How do I break in? if so, you aren’t alone. Keep reading.

Shortcuts:

• Preparation Before the Meeting

• The Right Mindset

  • What NOT to do:

  • What TO do:

• Your Go-To Opener

  • Pro Tips:

• Making a Great First Impression

• Ending the Conversation

• Quick Recap (TLDR)

I was going to get into respect this week. (the third element of a great first impression)

But I wanted to give you something you can use this week when you walk into a new space for the first time.

I know starting a conversation in a new space can feel like the hardest part. You told me, "Once we get into conversation, it's easy," but starting? That’s the tricky bit.

It can feel overwhelming and scary.

You’re not alone. In this newsletter, I’m going to show you exactly how I approach these situations. When you read this, you might think, “Does it really take all that?”

At first, yes—it takes concentrated effort. But over time, it’ll become second nature.

Sidenote: Have you been practicing adding fun and building trust into your first impressions?

Here’s what I want you to do: (To go from overwhelmed to confident in new settings)

Preparation Before the Meeting

Before you head into that meeting, Bible study, or hangout, take 3–5 minutes to listen to a stand-up comedian. (I listen to Michael Jr, Hasan Minhaj, Nate Bargatze)

Why? Two reasons:

1. It’ll prime your brain to find funny moments.

2. It’ll boost your energy and enthusiasm.

Both of these make you more attractive to people. You'll develop an enthusiasm that you carry with you everywhere—and people will notice. (it’ll also ease the anxiety of walking into a new space)

The Right Mindset

Now that you’ve prepped with a little humor, let’s talk about your mindset when you walk into the room.

What NOT to do:

Try to meet everyone.

What TO do:

Aim for 1–3 quality conversations at each event or meeting.

Why?

It’s far better to have one meaningful conversation and remember someone’s name than to meet 12 people and remember none of them next week.

The long-term value? If you consistently meet 1–3 people each week, you’ll naturally build deeper connections over time—without the pressure of trying to “network” with everyone.

Your Go-To Opener

My favorite line to start a conversation is simple:
"Hey, I don’t think I’ve met you yet. I’m [Your Name]."

Pro Tips:

• Eye Contact: Look them in the eyes.

• Smile: Make it genuine.

• Handshake: Firm but not crushing. No limp noodles, either. Practice with a friend if you’re unsure.

Why this line works:

It subtly suggests you already know other people in the room. You just haven’t met them yet. That small shift in perception makes a big difference.

Practice it out loud a few times. Seriously. It’ll feel natural when you use it.

Making a Great First Impression

Once you’ve started the conversation, it’s all about leaving a great impression. There are four key elements to focus on:

1. Fun: Add a little humor to your answers.

   • For example, when someone asks, “Where are you from?” I’ll say, “I’m from the traffic capital of the world.”

   • Or if they ask what I do, I might say, “I karate chop the dirt off cars.”

The goal is to spark a smile or laugh. People remember how you make them feel, not just what you say.

2. Trust: Use high fives.

   • Any time someone shares a win or good news, give them a high five.

   • It’s small, but it builds trust through physical touch in a non-intrusive way.

3. Respect: Show congruency between your values and actions.

   • For example, I’ll explain that my business aligns with my values: Love, Growth, and Adventure.

   • Love means visiting family. Growth comes from running a business. Adventure is the freedom to travel and try new things.

   • People respect you when they see you living out your values.

4. Spotlight: Turn the focus back on them.

   • Ask follow-up questions. Be genuinely curious.

Ending the Conversation

Here’s how to gracefully wrap things up:
"Would it be overstepping to grab your number or IG/LinkedIn?"

Use context to decide:

• Phone numbers/Facebook/business cards for older contacts.

• Instagram for people closer to your age.

Once you exchange info, text them your full name right away to avoid typos.

Quick Recap (TLDR)

1. Mindset: 1–3 quality conversations.

2. Preparation: Listen to 3–5 minutes of a comedian.

3. Opener: "Hey, I don’t think I’ve met you yet. I’m [Your Name]."

4. Impressions: Focus on Fun, Trust, Respect, and Spotlighting them.

5. Ending: Ask for their contact info politely.

This might feel like a lot at first, but with practice, it’ll become natural. Don’t feel bad for trying—it’s okay to put effort into improving your social skills.

I’m here to make caring cool again.

If you enjoyed this, check out the full newsletter on Fun, Trust, Respect,(next week) and Spotlighting others.(week after next) Also, give How to Win Friends and Influence People a read—it’s a classic for a reason.

Well, that’s all for now. Adios!

–Daniel

P.S. Thank you for responding/DMing/texting me that this content is helpful. Seems like a small thing, but I really appreciate it. (and it helps me know what to write about that will be truly useful to you)